My Secret Identity

So I have failed to blog regularly due to the fact that I am actually a super hero and have actual responsibilities saving the world and all… but until the next time,

Go check out this comic: http://www.bunny-comic.com/1436.html

Top Ten: Signs That You Are an Addict

10 ½ . You know the hacks for check out lines at your local Target.

10. The employees at the Starbucks next to that Target know you.

9. Every single xmas and birthday present you have received for the past four years is a Starbucks gift card, and you now own the ENTIRE Starbucks gift card line-up.

8. You met one of your best friends at a Starbucks (a barista of course).

7. A barista working at a Starbucks forty miles from where you live asks how your apartment move went (from a month ago).

6. Starbucks employees from multiple stores IN A DIFFERENT STATE know you.

5 ½ . About half of the Toast staff knows what you will order before you even walk through the door.

5. The Toast staff starts recognizing certain outfits from your vast clothing repertoire.

4. You freak out because Starbucks temporarily ran out of their custom sleeves and lids and is now using “common” supplies.

3. You have out-patronized seven cycles of employees at about five local Starbucks.

2. The medium-newb Starbucks baristas ask you how to make a Marble Mocha Macchiato.

1. You have a long-standing arrangement with a certain Starbucks store IN ANOTHER STATE to remain open until your arrival… like ten minutes after close.

Top Ten: Reasons Why I ♥ LA

10.  I can whine about mid 80s temperatures 100 degree weather and not be pummeled (in both the physical and verbal sense) by the eavesdropping public.

9 1/2. Prostitutes are generally indistinguishable from the rest, or rather a large portion of the normal female population is generally indistinguishable from prostitutes… guilty.

9. It’s 50/50 whether she is his date or his daughter…

8 1/2. We are the melting pot of the US melting pot… just divided into various districts and subcultures. Little Ethiopia anyone?

8. The street signs in the neighborhood actually say “Little Ethiopia.” (That’s right, LA is legit.)

7. We can drive (but we fly) to Vegas.

6. ANYONE wearing large sunglasses and red lipstick in Hollywood or Beverly Hills is a magnet for tourists and cameras.

5. Gay Pride, Bitches!

4 1/2. Other cities: OMG IT’S A FILM CREW! DO YOU SEE ANY MOVIE STARS?!? WHAT ARE THEY FILMING!?!? OMG I DON’T KNOW WHO THEY ARE, BUT I WANT THEIR AUTOGRAPHS!

Los Angeles: FUCK FILMING, AGAIN!?!? HERE’S TAKING ANOTHER DETOUR…

4. Other cities: OMG I SAW ON TMZ LAST NIGHT, BRITNEY SPEARS TOTALLY RAN OVER A GUY’S FOOT! THAT’S LIKE SOO CRAZY!

Los Angeles: FUCK!  FUCK!  FUCK! MY FOOT!

3. Yellow traffic lights actually do mean speed up.

2.  Los Angeles people aren’t snobbish like San Francisco “Northern California People.” Though we may eat 100% organic, we are 100% FAKE, and we don’t give a damn about it.

1. Los Angeles is an addiction, the greatest love/hate relationship of all time.

A Comical Burn: Thirds

Oh xkcd, how you speak the brutal truth so honestly…

♥s for xkcd.

Bot Me.

Check out my sexy robot! Click on the link for the flash version. (hint: She might dance for you!)

Au Weh.

So many good ideas that I have read in this batch of papers, just poor, poor execution. Such a sad tragedy to read an opportunity wasted.

Get Well Soon TR

Oh, how we love Trent Reznor, the man with his own NIN army.

Posted on NIN.com:

Attention:

I am not your stupid Bank of Brandice.

A Strange Feeling

I really do not have much to say other than:

1) I am too old for this no sleep, social calendar thing that I seem to be partaking in lately.

2) It’s not like I haven’t been doing this school thing for the past 16 years of my life, and yet this first day of school feels so foreign.  I almost feel like I have been out in the real world for years, and I am returning to this college thing as a veteran adult, looking at the younglings like I don’t quite fit in.  Or perhaps it’s just because I am sitting in the business school where I very obviously don’t fit in. Maybe the universe will realign itself when I am visiting the usual buildings that I have frequented in the past.

Void

I searched for a long time through the heartless photoshopped sludge on the internet to find one of my favorite photographs of Michael Jackson.  Despite his personal dysfunction and scandal, no one can refute the tremendous impact Michael Jackson had on performing, dancing, pop culture, and music as a whole. The legend of Michael Jackson is larger than his self and his faults; his existence as an icon will endure forever and outlive his darker side.

I learned of his death from my hairdresser in a salon far enough from Beverly Hills for the news to be buzzing but not ridiculous like the circus outside of the UCLA hospital. At the time the news seemed substantial enough; however, I was only mildly bothered that an icon had passed.  His death was no more important to me than that. I was slightly irritated while eating sushi next door between hair treatments that the news was non-stop coverage of his passing and continued as such throughout the day. Everyone talked about it, everywhere. Hollywood was a joke due to the large amounts of traffic around his stars.

A few days passed before the sheer magnitude of his death hit me.  I never saw Michael Jackson in concert, and his golden era was before my time. But pictures of his performances, his music videos, and his music began to give me the chills as I finally realized how much talent was lost that day. He is a legend, an icon, and one of those immensely talented people that only number a handful each generation.

I will never see Michael Jackson in concert.  He is one more experience I will miss out on in life.